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Joke Category: Men & Women - Yeah baby!Joke No:  399

Quotable Marriage Experiences

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
~ Milton Berle

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
~ James Holt McGavran

I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste.
~ David Bissonette

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
~ Sacha Guitry

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin, they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
~ Hemant Joshi

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
~ Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them.
~ Dumas

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?"
~ Sigmund Freud


I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
~ Anonymous

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
~ Henry Youngman

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
~ Sam Kinison

"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't."
~ Patrick Murray

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
~ Nash

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
~ Rodney Dangerfield


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