Funtoosh Network  - New  Tech2buzz.com  - New  Rechargebatteryguide.com  -  PHPBuddy.com August 16, 2022   
Funtoosh logo  
        
    bookmark funtoosh.com     Become Funtoosh Fan on Facebook      Rss feed
Homesms jokesGamesFunny VideosVisual JokesGalleriesSubmit Content
  Jokes Categories  
 Popular Jokes
 Personality
 Men vs Women
 Garam Masala
 Ajit and Robert
 Computer
 Cricket Jokes
 Economist
 Indian desi jokes
 Life not a joke
 Men Gods Beta Ver
 Stupid or Crazy
 Office Humor
 Political Politics
 Santa and Banta


Other Sections
 SMS Jokes
 Games
 Funny Videos
 Pictures
 Visual Jokes
 Home

 
  Jokes Category  >>  Office Humor  Joke No : 220 
Management and the CRAP Program

Dear Staff,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the worldwide slowdown of economies, since the late 2008, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 30 plus years of age on early retirement.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retiring Appropriate People Early). People selected for RAPE can also apply to management for eligibility in SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). People who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW scheme (Systematic Coursing Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate.

People who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependents or Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously people who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by management.

People staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of SHIT it gives to its employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please apply for CRAP (Corporate Rescue - Advanced Program).

Our Management has been trained to give you all the CRAP you may require to excel.

Yours Sincerely,
The Management

 Joke Added : 05, February 
 Submited by : Navnets  Views: 30,800
Next Joke Current Rating: 4.65   (60 Votes)
  Rate this Joke  
Share this Joke with your Friends!
Stats: This Joke has been emailed 158 times!

Your Name     
Your Email     
Friend's email address:
1:  2: 
3:  4: 
5:  6: 
Optional message to your friends:

Image Verification
Enter Verification Number
 Automatically save form fields! (More Info)

* Funtoosh respects your privacy and doesn't share or store any info you submit via this form. For more info refer to our privacy policy.


Popular Jokes
  I don't want to go to office t..
  Ode to my Boss!! ..
  Change of office furniture req..
  COMPANIES HIRE PEOPLE? Cogn..
  Importance of proper instructi..
  Now quit complaining about you..
  k After 2 years of selfless ..
  Stressed do this YOGASANA afte..
  A file that every office shoul..
  nt Lessons Lesson Number On..
  Can we also have an Office at ..

Site Related Links
  Add to Favorites
  Random Jokes Generator
  Print Version
  Submit Content


The World of Beer Lovers!

65 Votes
70,460 Views
The Carefree Indian women

244 Votes
139,222 Views
The Effect's of Drinking!

192 Votes
119,998 Views
Please Don't Disturb Me!

287 Votes
136,225 Views
How Quickly the Year's Pass!

72 Votes
58,906 Views
Brand New, Latest model of Blu...

85 Votes
66,247 Views

Your Feed-back and commentsComments/Suggestions       Home       Advertise on FuntooshAdvertise on Funtoosh     
Copyright 1999 - 2022 All Rights Reserved.