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THE WONDERFUL MAN: IDEAL vs. REAL
IDEAL REAL (what you want) (what you're lucky to get)
-intellectual -reads "interesting articles" in "Palyboy"
-artistic -often wears matching socks
-considerate -splatters just a bit only leaves the seat up 50% of the time
-interested in your mind -sometimes looks up from your chest
-faithful -only looks at other babes in your absence
-hopelessly romantic -able to distinguish between cactus and rose
-classy -keeps "Playboys" hidden
-sensitive -notices when you cry
-communicates well -answers phone sometimes
-cross-cultural -swears in Spanish
-progressive -knows difference between "woman" and "girl"
-Great lover -sex lasts longer than cigarette
-loves kids and pets -had snake he fed live things to
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