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    A Random Joke

    Various Stages of Life - Male and Female!

    THE MALE STAGES OF LIFE

    AGE DRINK
    17 - beer
    25 - vodka
    35 - bourbon
    48 - double bourbon
    66 - Maalox

    AGE SEDUCTION LINE
    17 - My parents are away for the weekend.
    25 - My girlfriend is away for the weekend
    35 - My fiance is away for the weekend.
    48 - My wife is away for the weekend.
    66 - My second wife is dead.

    AGE DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE
    17 - tongue
    25 - breakfast
    35 - She didn't set back my therapy
    48 - I didn't have to meet her kids
    66 - Got home alive.

    AGE FAVORITE FANTASY
    17 - getting to third
    25 - airplane s*x
    35 - menage a trois
    48 - taking the company public
    66 - firm bowel movement

    WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED?
    17 - 25
    25 - 35
    35 - 48
    48 - 66
    66 - 17

    AGE IDEAL DATE

    17 Triple Stephen King feature at a drive-in
    25 Split the check before we go back to my place
    35 Just come over
    48 Sex in the company jet on the way to Vegas.
    66 Just come over and cook.


    THE FEMALE STAGES OF LIFE

    AGE DRINK
    17 - Wine Coolers
    25 - White wine
    35 - Red wine
    48 - Dom Perignon
    66 - Shot of Jack with an Ensure chaser

    AGE EXCUSES FOR REFUSING DATES
    17 - Need to wash my hair
    25 - Need to wash and condition my hair
    35 - Need to color my hair
    48 - Need to have Francois color my hair
    66 - Need to have Francois color my wig

    AGE FAVORITE SPORT
    17 - shopping
    25 - shopping
    35 - shopping
    48 - shopping
    66 - shopping

    AGE DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE
    17 - Burger King
    25 - Free meal
    35 - A diamond
    48 - A bigger diamond
    66 - Home Alone

    AGE FAVORITE FANTASY
    17 - tall, dark and handsome
    25 - tall, dark and handsome with money
    35 - tall, dark and handsome with money and a brain
    48 - a man with hair
    66 - a man

    AGE WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED?
    17 - 17
    25 - 25
    35 - 35
    48 - 48
    66 - 66

    AGE IDEAL DATE
    17 - He offers to pay
    25 - He pays
    35 - He cooks breakfast the next morning
    48 - He cooks breakfast the next morning for the kids
    66 - He can chew breakfast


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